Larissa Mulder
- May 23, 2023
- 4 min read

Fear, Imposter Syndrome and the Divine Feminine

Updated: May 24, 2023

"You cannot stand in your own power without fear unless you know who you are and own it. The strengths and the weaknesses, the shadow and the light. If you don’t know who you are and claim it you will look to others for permission to be who you think you might be or desire to be someday. " - Rebecca Campbell

Many of us struggle with things like letting our voices be heard and letting our true selves be seen. We fear being silenced and we fear what others may think or say. It is time to let go of that fear. It is time to let go of all the times someone told you that you're not pretty enough, not good enough, not smart enough, not thin enough, too thin, not white enough, not black enough, too loud or not loud enough. Let it go. We have always been good enough. It is time to own it!

The way to get out of fear is to get into your heart.

“We do not fear the unknown. We fear what we think we know about the unknown.” Teal Swan

What is the divine masculine and the divine feminine and how does it relate to our modern fears?

Balance is everything. The world has been out of balance for a long time and we have the power now to bring it back into equilibrium.

Everyone has access to both masculine and feminine energy, regardless of sex or gender.

The divine feminine and divine masculine can be thought of like yin and yang—they're both necessary for balance, but they are different. Too much feminine energy can lead to indecisiveness and not enough action. And too much masculine, can lead to a domineering nature.

Divine Masculine Traits:

Risk-taking
Assertiveness
Action-oriented
Discipline
Boundaries
Confidence
Objectivity
Logic and analysis
Warrior
Yang
Survival

The qualities of the divine feminine can be seen throughout many religious and spiritual traditions in the form of goddesses and powerful feminine figures such as Shakti in Hinduism, Venus in Roman mythology and Mother Mary in Christianity.

She is soft, but fierce when necessary. She operates from her heart centre, is intuitive, wise and compassionate.

Qualities of the divine feminine:

Intuitive
Heart-centered
Compassionate
Wise
Accepting
Forgiving
Collaborative
Reflective
Creative
Sensual
Kind
Gentle

Many lessons about the divinine feminine can be learnt from ancient times where people lived in rhythm with the Earth’s cycles. In rhythm with the seasons. They celebrated and honoured the changing seasons marking each with a celebration or festival.

Women’s bodies were honoured and seen as sacred. The cyclical nature of the earth and the cyclical nature of women’s bodies were celebrated.

Women celebrated and respected each other. They weren’t in competition with each other like we are today, but supported each other, especially with the transitions from one stage of life to the other.

As time went on, women were persecuted, silenced and oppressed. Especially those who were healers, doctors and medicine women. Wise women were seen as witches.

Why is this important for us today?

We all carry those fears of our ancestors within us and many of us are still being silenced in some form or another.

So how do we get over our feelings of not being good enough and find our own power? How do we remember who we really are?

We have a new role as women living in the current time to teach each other and to support each other. There is nothing more powerful than a circle of women getting together in support of each other. Stop judging and comparing and start uplifting each other and show the men around you, helping them to do the same.

We also need to go back to the old ways in terms of seeing nature as sacred and us as part of it, connecting to the wisdom that is inside us and to remember our own power. For example, we can look at time differently.

Chronos time is how we measure our days and our lives quantitatively. Kairos is the qualitative time of life. I think it’s important to create more Kairos moments in your life – just being in nature, reading a book, looking at a sunset. Chronos time, linear time is not necessarily the best way for everyone. Yes, by all means plan your day, plan your week. But be flexible and take the guilt out of it. Allow life to flow. Allow yourself to flow and be creative. Be soft in that way. Be more like water. If you need to rest, rest. Let go of the guilt and the fear of performing to someone else’s timeline. Or even to your own. Be more flexible.

What is Imposter Syndrome?

The term “imposter syndrome” was first coined in the 1970’s by psychologists who noticed a pattern of high-achieving women who struggled with feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. Though it’s not a recognised mental health disorder, imposter syndrome is acknowledged as a common experience that can have a significant impact on one’s mental health and well-being. Research suggests that up to 70% of people will experience imposter syndrome at some point in their lives.

"Imposter syndrome is the result of structural inequality not individual inadequacy. Women have to constantly prove themselves. This is why impostor syndrome is a lie we've bought into. We've been made to feel that we're not good enough. We've always been good enough." - Reshma Saujani

Tips to overcoming feelings of not being good enough:

1. Know that no one stands in your way except yourself

2. No one gets to say who you are, except you.

3. You deserve to be here

3. Monitor your inner dialogue. Look at the bigger picture. A simple exercise of asking yourself how you might support a friend who minimises their accomplishments and then applying the same supportive language to yourself.

4. Share your feelings with others – especially in supportive spaces and communities.

3. People who struggle with impostor feelings tend to brush off their successes. If someone congratulates you, don’t move on too fast. Pay attention to how you respond and aim to speak more positively about yourself. Take time to applaud yourself, this can help you internalise your success.